When I Said 'Goodbye'
by Evening Edition
Summary: But neither had the courage to make a move, to realize that the pain was real. Warning:Slash...my first


Notes: Many of you know me as Matchin' Laces. However, I created this penname so I could write stories without fear of my parents reading them. They and my friends know my other account. I know that they would not approve of these stories.

This is my first slash, so please give me any helpful criticism on it. I want your honest opinion. I just know that I could never pull off pure fluff. I'm trying to go by the view of a serious relationship between two people of the same gender.

Disclaimer: I do not own Newsies…they belong to Disney.

I do own the song 'When I Said 'Goodbye''.

"Snitch, would you look at me," Skittery pleaded with his friend. He was no longer the expressionless face in a sea of smiles, "I know you're angry at me, but I can explain."

"Explain what," Snitch asked, turning to look at him. He was trying to sound angry, but the tears were evident in his eyes as he tried to hide the evidence, "Why you did this to me?"

"You think it was my idea to move," Skittery questioned, "I don't want to go. I'll be leaving you behind. You're my best friend…and more." He paused, "We leave at noon tomorrow."

"And you're just now telling me this," Snitch stated, all anger gone from his voice, "You couldn't have told me a week ago?"

"I didn't know," Skittery protested, "They threw it in my face two days ago. I didn't know how to tell you."

The silence that came between them wasn't awkward, though it should have been. Skittery looked at Snitch, trying to describe without words the pain he felt inside.

"Skittery," Snitch asked tentatively, wordlessly asking for permission to continue. The boy in front of him turned without a sound, eyes revealing his answer, "What I said the other day…I meant it."

"I know you did," Skittery replied, "and I feel the same. I wish it meant that I could just forget all about this stupid move."

"You can," Snitch told him, a hope glowing in his eyes, "Tell your parents that you won't go with them. Tell them that you're in love with me."

"I can't," Skittery answered, "That's why we're moving. They wanted me to stay away from you. I told them 'no'. I guess that was my mistake."

"Since when is loving someone a mistake," Snitch questioned.

"Apparently, it is when two boys are in love," Skittery told him, "It's wrong for my parents to think that way." Silence reigned over them at this.

"Remember when we admitted that we liked each other," Snitch asked with a smile. Both boys were well aware that Skittery was leaving soon. Therefore, they tried to hold onto the memories that they had left.

_"Snitch," Skittery asked after school that Wednesday afternoon, a stutter in his voice,"I have to tell you something." Snitch looked at him in confusion. What could Skittery possibly have to say to him that made him so nervous? _

_"What,"Snitch questioned, silently wishing him to continue, a little impatient._

_"This isn't something I would usually say to a guy," Skittery continued before swallowing hard, "Snitch? I…like you." _

_"I like you too Skitts," Snitch stated, a bit of puzzlement in his voice. He and Skittery were best friends…why wouldn't they like each other?_

_"You don't get it Snitch," Skittery told him, "I don't just like you as a friend…it's more than that."  
Snitch froze at these words. Secretly, he had been hoping that this was what Skittery was talking about. However, in his mind, it seemed to be completely absurd and unlikely. He stared at Skittery in shock, though he tried to hide it. _

_Skittery shifted from one foot to the next, scraping the cement with the soles of his shoes. When no answer came, his shoulders slumped as he started to turn around, intending to walk away. _

_Snitch snapped out of his shock at that moment and reached out a hand to stop him. Skittery looked at him with a face ready for rejection. Snitch however, did the most unexpected thing. _

_Snitch kissed him. Skittery had always thought that kissing another boy would be weird, gross…just like how he had been taught. But this was much more than he had imagined. How their lips fell together perfectly. How they fit into each other's arms exactly right. He was surprised at the shiver that ran up his spine, exploding inside him as he deepened the kiss._

But that had been 6 months ago. That was before Skittery had finally admitted to his parents that he was gay. Now, they stood facing each other, silently wishing that someone would pinch them and prove that it was all a dream…a nightmare. But neither had the courage to make a move, to realize that the pain was real. Neither could think of the words to say for everything to once again make complete and perfect sense. So, they didn't say anything at all.

Skittery initiated the kiss, once again marveling at how perfect they fit into each other and how their lips match perfectly. He didn't care that he was supposed to have been home hours ago and that his parents expected that he was still in bed. He didn't care that the hour was approaching midnight. All he cared about was the single moment he shared with the boy he was with, loving the feeling of warmth and pure joy that he felt at that moment.

When they separated, breathless, they just looked at each other, not wanting the moment to end. Snitch looked into Skittery's eyes and he knew that nothing could be done.

Skittery lifted a hand to cup the side of Snitch's face, a sad expression adorning his usual emotionless appearance. Skittery slid his hand down, brushing it against Snitch's cheek.

"Goodbye," Skittery whispered. His last farewell. Then, he left…turned away and kept on walking.

Skittery never looked back and Snitch knew why. If Skittery took one final glance, he wouldn't be able to leave. But he had no choice in the matter. The only movement was that of Skittery's feet moving to their own sorrowful beat and the heaving shoulders that Snitch knew covered hidden tears.

Snitch watched as Skittery moved further and further out of sight…and out of his life. He wasn't angry anymore. He couldn't be when it broke Skittery's heart as much as it broke his own. Skittery never said the words, but Snitch knew that he felt the same.

Though there would be miles between them, there was still the bond of love that continued to exist. Snitch knew that he would never find another like Skittery and he never planned to. So, Snitch turned away from the life he knew and returned home.

I know you're angry

I know you hate me

But please give me a chance to reply

I didn't want you to cry

Please let me explain

That when I said your name

I never thought it meant 'the end'

That we couldn't just be friends

Then there came that day

When I heard you say

Those three fateful words

I wasn't sure of what I heard

I know it's hard

I know I broke your heart

But I didn't plan on this

From one simple kiss

When I said 'goodbye'

I never planned on finding you

To find something so true

I didn't mean for it to end this way

I wish that I could stay

So here I go

Though I know

That if I look back once more

I'll never make it to the door

I'll still love you from afar

Though the miles will leave a scar

That I'll never fill that hole

The piece that you stole

I know it's hard

I know I broke your heart

But I didn't plan on this

From one simple kiss

When I said 'goodbye'

I never wanted this

(Background) When I said 'goodbye'

From one simple kiss

(Background) When I said 'goodbye'

So here I go

Though I know

(Background) When I said 'goodbye'

That I'll never fill that hole

(Background) When I said 'goodbye'

The piece that you stole

(Background) When I said 'goodbye'

When I said 'goodbye'

When I said 'goodbye'


End file.
